My wife picked up on the second ring. I was standing alone on top of Grays Peak, 14,278 feet, and I could not get a full sentence out.
“I did it. I love you.” That was all I had. Then my eight-year-old son got on the phone and asked the only question that mattered: “Why did you climb the mountain?”
“Because it was there,” I said. I was completely gassed and it was all I could think of at that moment. The real answer is simpler. Because I made a commitment.
14,278 FTGrays Peak, ColoradoUnder-trained, anxious, and committed anyway.
01 THE SETUP
I committed to this hike back in July. I built a training plan. Then I prioritized work, the calendar filled up, and most of that plan stayed on paper. I flew to Colorado under-trained. I was anxious. I was not sure how my body would respond.
The night before the climb, Sterling Hawkins, who leads these No Matter What experiences, sat us down at dinner and asked each of us two things.
Before the first step
- What do you want out of this?
- Why are you here?
In the morning at the trailhead, he asked us to say our intentions out loud before we took a step. And he told us the summit was up there, but our own summit did not have to be the top of the mountain.
I did not fully understand why that mattered until I was above 13,000 feet.
02 ABOVE 13,000 FEET
That is where my heart stopped beating in my chest and started beating in my ears. Then my throat. My legs were solid. My lungs were not. Every breath felt like breathing through a tiny straw, and I remember thinking: this is where the mountain asks you if you are committed to the actual summit, or if you just want to stop here.
03 THE KICK
Here is something I have known about myself since I ran track. I start in the back. I stay steady. I keep something in the tank. And I know, from a thousand reps, exactly when to start my kick.
Years ago I tested for the FBI. I was eight to ten years older than everyone on that track. Going into the last lap and a half, I was a full lap behind the leader. Then I kicked into the extra gear I have always had in waiting, the one others do not know is there until they see it. I sprinted the whole way home and finished first by twenty yards.
On Grays, with the top in view, I felt it. Not a decision. An instinct. I knew I was close and I knew I had something left. I decided the actual summit was my commitment and I left the group. When I finally turned around, I was looking down into the clouds and there was nobody in front of me. Nobody behind me. I was alone. Sometimes a commitment can feel that way, and that is okay.
04 WHY IT WORKED
I want to be honest about why that worked, because it was not the training. It worked because of how we started. Sterling built the environment before the first step. Intentions on the table at dinner. Intentions out loud at the trailhead. And when we all got back down, one more question: what did the mountain give you?
THE ENVIRONMENT YOU BUILD AT THE START DECIDES HOW YOU FINISH. NOT FITNESS. THE CLARITY.
05 WHAT THE MOUNTAIN GAVE ME
What the mountain gave me was a commitment. My health is going to be a priority, not the first thing that gets shoved to the back burner the second life gets stressful or overscheduled. That sounds easy. It is not. Wanting it is not enough. I have to build the environment and the weekly habits that make it real, and I am using our own WIN MONDAY® playbook to do it.
I told the group during our debrief meal something I had needed to hear for a long time: taking care of yourself does not mean you care for the people you love any less. It means you plan to be around for them. As Paul, our Founder, always says, "Availability is the best ability."
